Self-care. Two words that get a lot of hype these days, and for good reason. Self-care almost seems to be a trend. It definitely has a “cool” vibe. Yet, in this fast paced, instant gratification, and social media world that we are living in, self-care is actually crucial. People feel busier than ever, and we are. There is always something to do and something on the schedule. Add in the addictive nature of a smart phone and we have a society that is stressed out. Our brains were not meant to process this much stuff constantly. Stress levels seem to be on the rise, and our brains desperately need a chance to chill out.

Have you ever been scrolling through social media and felt off? I’m not saying depressed, just not right. This happens to me, and I believe that it is my brain trying to tell me that it needs a minute. The lights from my device as well as the content my brain is taking in is overwhelming. Many people assume that sitting and perusing through the internet is good down time (and it can be) but then wonder why they still don’t feel relaxed. (After surfing the gram, I never feel as decompressed as when I go sans device and enjoy a quiet minute with a cup-o-decaf.) As a whole, we are addicted to social media and we are addicted to being busy. Most people literally have trouble stopping and doing nothing or doing something just for the simple pleasure of it. Though we need moments where we enjoy both of those things. We need moments to indulge in some good ole fashioned TLC (a.k.a. self-care).

Self-care: Intentionally doing something for yourself that feels relaxing and comforting. An activity that helps you unwind. Taking a moment to focus on your person. In other words, ANYTHING that brings joy to your soul. Self-care doesn’t have to be a glass of wine, in a bubble bath, with your favorite face mask on, while listening to Frank Sinatra. Though that is nice, I feel exhausted just thinking about executing that. By the time I find a minute to actually take a bubble bath, it’s late. Then there is all the prep work just to get into said bath. Sheesh. In this current phase of mommy hood, I need a glass of wine just thinking about that scenario.

So let’s talk realistic self-care. Things you can do to unwind and focus on you Every. Single. Day. That’s right, you heard me. EVERY. DAY. Because you’re worth it. (Okay, you just read that in the cadence of a L’ORÉAL commercial didn’t you?) Here is the kicker. You don’t have to do some big thing to relax. It just needs to be something that you 1.) Enjoy 2.) Find Relaxing. For me, it’s going on a walk in the remaining sunlight at the end of the day once the kids are in bed. It’s reading a book. (More like consuming a book, but we don’t need to talk about that right now.) It’s using children’s paint pens in a $3 booklet that I bought at target. Even though I am no Picasso, it calms my brain and helps me relax. It’s spending time in my mini garden (whenever the mosquitos aren’t terrible) and taking in the sounds and sights of nature. It’s sitting in my living room in the afternoon, drinking a cup of decaf coffee, and turning off all the lights in the house to enjoy the natural light. Most days I also take a few minutes to just gaze out the window. Natural light + greenery fills me with joy. All of these things can take as little or as much time as I want. All of these things get me to unplug and focus on a simple pleasure.

Find what speaks to you. Find what makes you happy to your core. Try to do this thing for at least five minutes a day. That’s five beautiful minutes your brain gets to focus on just one task while you take nice deep breaths and do something that you enjoy. Once you get in the habit of taking some intentional time for yourself, don’t be surprised if that five minutes turns into thirty. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself less stressed, feeling more joy, and gaining some patience that you thought you lost during your child’s toddler years.

Ideas for those five beautiful minutes (no cell phones aloud): Enjoy a glass of wine in a room alone, grab a coffee and your favorite chair to cuddle up on, do a guided meditation class (I love the ones on the Peloton app. Tone It Up also has great ones.), take a walk outside, read a book, paint a picture (You don’t have to do it well. You just have to enjoy it.), color in a coloring book (there are even specific ones for adults), listen to music (You might need a smart phone for this. If so, play music, turn it on do not disturb, and then flip it over.), sit in your closet and listen to classical music (don’t knock it till you try it), write in a journal, try a new recipe (from a cookbook or printed out), go for a jog, do a face mask (I like the sheet masks so that there is no cleanup afterwards.), or simply stare at a wall. (I get it, with young kids sometimes all you want is a quiet space and to look at nothing. No judgement here.) **If you need a minute, but can’t break away, try having an impromptu dance party with the kids. It’s a great way to put smiles on everyones faces. **

Don’t feel guilty for taking time for yourself. It is so important to take care of you. It is so important to practice self-care. You will be the best version of you when your brain gets a chance to unwind. Find something that you enjoy, and then give yourself some love. Let yourself indulge in five beautiful minutes of self-care.

XOXO